Horoscope

My initials are HAM and I was born under the Chinese sign of the Boar. Look what my horoscope for this week is:

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): To the ancient Chinese, pigs were sacred because they could eat anything, and turn it into energy. The creatures were regarded as masters of transmutation. Nothing, not even garbage, was unusable to them. The Chinese aspired to be like pigs in the sense of being able to learn from and derive benefit from every experience, not just the tidy, tasteful ones. I mention this, Sagittarius, because it's an excellent time for you to imitate that paragon of holiness, the omnivorous pig.